Do you say what you mean?

It’s hard to imagine anyone answering “no” to that question, isn’t it? Surely the vast majority of people believe that their words are a fair representation of their thoughts and feelings.

The bigger question is, “Do you do what you say?”

While people do most likely mean what they say, despite that, they often do something else. It happens a lot, doesn’t it? There are many cases where people’s words and actions don’t match.

I recall a time when my husband Mark called me out on this…and as much as I wish I could say that he was mistaken…he was right on the money. Throughout the first year of our marriage I was adapting to living in a new city and state where I knew no one, so my husband became accustomed to me being at home and anxiously awaiting his arrival home from work.

It didn’t take long for this Type A personality to build her own network of friends, co-workers, and those with which to co-minister. Along with that network came a whole lot of time commitments.

I remember Mark sarcastically asking me if he could “schedule” a time slot with me. My defensive comeback led to a heated discussion wherein I tried to validate that our marriage relationship still came first in my life.

You see, I had a whole lot of heartfelt words expressing the value I placed on my marriage, but my actions were telling a different story.

I couldn’t argue with what we all know — actions speak louder than words. 100H

I had been tattled on by one of the two biggest tattletales in life…the CALENDAR. What’s the other big tattletale you ask? It is the CHECKBOOK.

Where you send your TIME and where you spend your MONEY

will always reveal who or what you truly value.

What I say I value is not what I value. I shout with my choices what I value.

So, let’s take a moment and look in the mirror and have a little talk with ourselves.

  • What or who do I value most in this life? Make a list of the top 4-7.
  • Is this where or with whom I spend the most of my time?
  • Is this where or with whom I spend the most of my money?


We cannot honestly SAY that list we just created is what and who we value most in this life if we aren’t ACTING on it with the investment of our time and our money.

I continue to use this as a tool for evaluation in my life. For instance, I was very challenged by this when I realized that if I valued God so highly, I would be willing to spend money on any resource or retreat that would draw me closer to Him, but I wasn’t. I wanted to justify it with the money we tithed or gave in support of various missionaries and ministries, but it fell flat in my spirit. I knew that if I valued God as much as I said I did, then I wouldn’t become a cheap bargain-basement follower when it came to drawing closer to Him.

What challenges you when you hold up what you “say you value” to how you “actively spend your time and money?”